Frustrations and Contemplations

Today the church held a "work-day" at the church. Women and children were not advised to go because of the sewage waste contaminating the whole area. Think of all the things that go down a toilet and then think of it all mixing together and spreading throughout a building...and you will have a good idea of what our church is like. It was suggested that we bring in professional cleaning people because of the danger of contaminants-but our church doesn't have the financial means for such a move. The stinking insurance has managed to weasle their way out of the responsibilities they were SUPPOSED to have. So-we are left to do it on our own.
I am an able bodied person and was anxious to do my part-but I had no one to watch Corynn as her Grandma Newman threw out her back. So I met my sister and my mom and we went shopping together. Boy do I feel like a bump on a log. All day my hubby and who knows how many others have been working hard-and I have been just twiddling my thumbs... I have been thinking of them all day-but what good does thinking about them do? Everyone assures me I shouldn't be there, that it is best that the "menfolk" deal with this mess until it is cleaned up a bit more. Maybe it's best...but it just doesn't feel right. Next weekend, regardless of what is "suggested", I am GOING to be there-working along side my husband to help get our church back to where it once was.
Anyway-thinking on these things and seeing this past week unfold, I have come to some conclusions.
For one thing...I think that men have a better tolerance for stress than women. My hubby has gone to work at 3 or so in the morning each day this week, has been gone until four or later most days, is home for just a few minutes and then heads to the church to work until long after dark. The minute he comes home, he can't rid himself of the situation because people call in order to find out details and ask questions. The poor guy has been working so very hard. I would have crumbled long ago-but he keeps chugging away.
Another thing-I am amazed at how differently Matt handles stress. At one time in our marriage, his stress would become a dividing factor for us-I would try to be a sounding board but he would get upset at ME to vent his anger toward others. But now, it is almost as if he depends on me during stressful times....like the only place he finds comfort is here. What a wonderful difference and I can only account it to spiritual growth.
Finally, in hard times-without a doubt...Most of the burden is placed on certain individuals. Undoubtedly, in any situation, the go-getters lead and are thus forced to do the most. Matt and I have seen it these past few months with his work-and now with the church. It is a shame that everyone is not willing to get their hands dirty for the "cause". So many excuses drive those who are responsible to MADNESS. And those who are lazy find solace in the fact that it WILL get done because so-and-so is such a hard worker. I look longingly at the Amish culture and the unity among all. They are tremendously hard workers who care about their "family" of Amishmen. They know the value of hard work and do what must be done. They are wise enough to realize that though sometimes unpleasant, many hands make light work and strong ties. Oh-we have so much to learn. We have so much potential for growth. If only people would get there eyes turned toward the good in others...or even better, to the truly perfect example of our Heavenly Father. Why are we so foolish? Why are we so prideful and arrogant? Why do we care more for ourselves than for all of our Christian brothers? Why do we cut down on other denominations because of certain things they do instead of learning from their good. We are not perfect! We are not where we should be! We need as much help and growth as any others! We should be ashamed of ourselves, just ashamed.