Incomplete......

Currently Reading: The Way Home by Mary Pride.

I really enjoy this book. It is very to the point and matter a fact. It offers LOTS of GREAT things to think about. I have even found ANOTHER topic for teaching women's group on. I have about three or four great ideas to choose from. I hope to get to all of them at some point. I remember reading this book before and putting in down after the first chapter because I was bored. When I picked it up this time, I skipped the first chapter and went right to the 'good stuff'. I am halfway done it now. I may decide to post about individual chapters-but not today.
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Well, yesterday Matt left to go to Vermont. He will be gone until late on Wednesday. Last night was horrible. We have a rule that whatever time it is-he must always call me when he is away on trips. My brain goes in all sorts of weird directions and I always start thinking the worst. So-for me to be able to sleep, I need to know that he got there safely and is okay. Well-I waited and waited and he didn't call so finally I went to bed. I unplugged the phone and brought it upstairs with me and plugged it in next to my bed for when he called. I didn't go to sleep until 12:30 and then it was a fitful sleep. When I woke up (for the fifth or sixth time) it was finally time to start the day. I hopped in the shower and put the phone on my vanity so if it were to ring, I could grab it. When I was done, I was started to dry off and I heard a man's voice downstairs. Matt was talking on the answering machine. I picked up the phone and started talking but he coming through. I ran downstairs-and there were four messages on the machine. I called him back and he was gone. I was frantic! A few minutes later he finally got me-and only because I tried to call him but our phone card was already in use (from him using it to call me!). I hate being away from him. A piece (a large piece) of me is missing when he is gone. Thankfully, he doesn't travel often. It is just unfortunate, that it seems to happen in spurts. When he arrives home on Wednesday night-he will be home on Thursday (well-besides work of course) just to leave on Friday to go to Canada to oversee another congregation within the RP church. It is one of his responsibilities as elder of our church. I am not sure why I couldn't come along. That means another two days without him. His leaving was traumatic. Corynn became frantic and I had to pry her arms from around his neck as she was screaming "Papa! Papa! Papa!" in desperation. By the time that ordeal was through, Corynn was crying, I was crying, and Matt's eyes were pretty wet looking too.

In other news...I am disappointed to announce that I am not pregnant. I was sure I was-2 weeks late and many other signs. I now know that that is not the case. I was absolutely 'sure' I was-and so I let me guard down and my hopes up. I got a great deal this weekend at a yard sale. I filled a bag to the BRIM with almost NEW quality items-clothes, blankets, and shoes for a little boy and paid only $2.00 for it. I went through that bag three or four times. I also got some maternity clothes-that I washed and tried on. I tried to sort out how we were going to fit our cradle in Corynns' bedroom and how I would fit a playpen downstairs. I even told some people in my excitement that I thought I was. Because of all of these things-this time was the hardest I have ever had in dealing with not being pregnant. Most times I just say-"well, it isn't time yet." This time, in my eyes, it was tradgedy. Because I let my gaurd down and my hopes up-it was such a disappointment to be wrong. I had just thought too much about it. I am over it now-remembering again my blessings. Remembering again that it is the Lord's timing and not mine. Remembering again how good those things are that you need to wait for. I have contemplated for a while the idea of not getting pregnant. At first, I believed that I was not getting pregnant because the Lord wanted to teach people in my life that people who don't agree with BC don't have a million kids...that HE is control and not we ourselves. I have come to look at it a different way-perhaps, more humbly. I now feel as though perhaps the Lord is using this time to show ME that HE is in control. Perhaps it is not OTHERS who need to learn the lesson-but myself! I do admit-I followed the worlds thinking that I would have lots of children (with the difference being I view children as a blessing!) and that we would have lots. Perhaps, though, it is NOT His will for me to have lots. Perhaps it is. But one thing is for sure and that is he is teaching me that I am not in control-no matter how hard we 'try'....having babies is a blessing that is given freely by the only one who can give it....our CREATOR. The Creator of LIFE. And so-I will wait patiently for His time-grateful for the time He has given me with only one child. I will work to use this time wisely. And during this time-you can be SURE, I WILL not be getting my hopes up again. I will not even test until I am ONE MONTH late. I will not daydream or fondle baby clothes or ANYTHING until I know for sure and for certain that there is, indeed, a little one growing in my belly.

I finished reading Genie: A Scientific Tragedy. The conclusion was written in a great way, I thought. I got the book at a rummage sale for 10 cents. 10 cents encouraged me to think about things, encouraged growth both intellectually and spiritually, and offered to be the topic of quite a few interesting conversations with people.

I am also finishing up Preserving the Harvest and have read ALL ABOUT CANNING AND PRESERVING (A Joy of Cooking book.) Paula-your husband might really like this book too. All About Canning is mostly recipes for WONDERFUL sounding foods. It is more recent and so has nice photographs of the food as well as step by step photographs of how to do the canning. While Preserving the Harvest is nearly ehaustive in how-to (with recipes too), The Joy of Cooking doesn't spend all that much time talking about how to do things but does give great ideas and recipes of what COULD be done. Just something to think about!

I have four loads of laundry to be done and hung out on the line. I also need to clean the refridge-inside and out, today. Other than that, I am just going to try and keep cool. I am going to post a few pictures this afternoon maybe. For my dear friends the Drijfhout family and for who is becoming a dear friend, Hillary. So-get ready!!!! :-)