This whole business of letting the babies fall where they may can really be excruciating in this culture. And I am not just talking about in Walmart....but even in the dealings with coworkers, friends, family, and even (sadly) in the church. Family can sometimes be the worst of all. The raised eyebrows and harsh comments are really irritating.
One of the ways I have always combated this problem is by mentally preparing everyone by joking around about it. That way, they can raise their eyebrows in private, not in surprise when you tell them you are pregnant again.
I joke about having twenty or so children. Likely won't happen, of course, but hey---it gets 'em prepared for ONE more pregnancy anyway. (Although-trust me: being 9 months pregnant is really changing my opinions on things. Yesterday I told Matt that "HEy! C-sections are actually sounding REALLY appealing to me!" He looked at me cross-eyed and said "You, my dear, are not thinking clearly. This is getting to your head!"
Another common joke is that we are trying to have one birthday for every month of the year. Which was working out splendidly-until Smooch.
Tomorrow is Corynn's birthday. 7 years old. SEVEN. How this can be, I will never know.
Who knows, she might get a baby for her birthday!
Guess I have to think up some other joke now.
Happy September 1st.
(sorry about the totally unrelated photo---you know me. Can't post without a photo and I didn't have any "fresh" ones except this one!)
15 comments:
Happy Birthday, Corynn!! Hope you are having a wonderful day!!
And for you Rebecca, just a happy note!! ((hugs)) Also to let you know with 3 children we are the small family amongst many of our friends. We are talking families numbering 4 to 12 children!! I think it is wonderful (it scares the bujeebuzz out of my husband but that is okay... Did I tell you that you look lovely?) Think of how mightily you are blessed!!
Take care sweetie!! Praying for you... (and I'll try not to have anymore dreams of you having twins. LOL it had nothing to do with size but with the fact that you had made both boy and girl stuff!)
I can deal with the Walmart comments, no problem. It is always the family comments that hurt so much. I've even told my family--Just say congratulations and stop otherwise we'll all regret it.
We were married 7 years before kids and were told constantly we should be having kids. There is never a perfect time. Three pregnancies in 27 months later and they all said too many too soon. We lost #3 and it took almost two years for the next to appear and they still make stupid comments. No pleasing.
Through it all, I've learned to just be happy for whomever is pregnant!!!
Ours will be 16 months apart, Lord willing - second due in Feb and we've gotten a few comments. Actually we simply announced this pregnancy on facebook and let our families tell people, rather than calling all our friends, knowing that many of them would have a hard time being excited for us.. might even be judgemental. And i didn't want to deal with that.
But we're doing what we feel is right for us right now. And no one has asked me yet 'don't you know how that happens' but i will be prepared. I've got like, 5 different witty answers depending on my mood so i won't even be irritated to be asked ;) well, not the first five times anyways....
I think joking helps a lot, I guess it defuses your own irritation at others' nosiness and rudeness.
Too bad your 'months' thing got messed up though ;)
Praying for you!
Rebecca, I always wanted to have one birthday for every month, too. Hannah changed that for us, too. John was really hoping she'd be born on his birthday but she came 3 days later. Just think know you still have 9 more chances to get one child's birthday in every month! :)
As to unwanted comments on family size, spacing, etc, I've learned to accept/expect it from family but I'm about sick of hearing it from a certain "medical professional". I keep hearing about how I've had "so many children, so close together". (I don't think 5 children in 8 years [and 3 days] seems like that many, that close.) And that I should really "use my brain" and not get pregnant again for at least a couple years. You don't know how upset that comment made me! Scott tells me to just let it go in one ear and out the other but it takes me awhile to get over it.
Anyway, you continue to be in my thoughts and prayers. Smooch will be here before you know it and then the days and weeks will fly by. I can't believe my little Hannah is 7 weeks old today!!!
Oh my, Rebecca!
I keep hoping your next post will come with lots of new baby pics, but still nada. :(
With my last pregnancy, I tried my best to "forget" my actual due date and did a pretty good job right up until the last week when husband/midwife started reminding me as I approached and moved past my due date. Oh well, I was pretty psyched up for being on the late end of things anyhow.
I certainly know what you mean about all of the comments. I just today got an "OMG" from someone when I told her this pregnancy was #4. Family comments are indeed the hardest b/c I can't really just not tell them when I'm expecting. I do, however, know that church is one place I can go and not get any negative comments about being pregnant no matter how many or how close.
I'll continue to pray you'll be delivered soon!
I've had my share of those same comments over the years, and they always stung. I often would say out loud, "Which one of them would you like us to give back?" That sorta quiets them for awhile, anyway.
Our birthdays are all in a row, it seems. Mine is in October, Autumn and Abigail are November, Collin, and Verne are in December. I always joked that I was cold in February and March and we did plenty of snuggling. ;-)
My brother and I share a birthday- 2 years apart. We loved it growing up. My girls are 6 years and 5 days apart. I wished they shared birthdays, but it wasn't to be.
Hang in there. I know your days are probably long with the waiting, and I'm praying for God to give you grace.
I was born on my sister's 1-th birthday and she cried because she already had 3 sisters and wanted a brother. Decades later, I think she's still crying! Personally, if you have gone this long, I hope they don't share a b-day because somehow it doesn't seem like the birthday is extra special for either child.
Smooch will come in God's time, but it would be nice if he had thought to check your calendar too!
I'm praying that you have a safe delivery.
Make that my sister's 10th birthday - not typing well tonight.
Happy Birthday to Little Miss!
Still praying for Mama. Next time you will have to do what I always did -- No matter when they said my due date was, I automatically from the very start made my due date two weeks later. When Orangeblossom came two weeks late, I felt like she was right on time.
Well my husband still laughs about the time when I was pregnant with number 4 I think...and my MIL said in front of a huge group of her friends "You'd think they'd learn what causes that!" and laughed - then obviously the filter was gone off my mouth because what came tumbling out was "Oh we know...and we LIKE it!" - funny thing is I was NOT embarrassed but she turned bright red. lol - Hey...don't mess with pregnant women!
Now at work I run into a few large families and we joke about all the comments - oh well - WE know the blessing of a large family!!!
Welcome to September Smooch - We know you're comfy - but can't wait to see ya! I know you can hear your momma telling you to come see her......now's a "gooda time as any" to start listening to your momma! :)
I think our family has finally learned to bite their tongues...I'm pretty sure they think it will just encourage us all the more. ;-)
Praying for you today...I know the days are always SO long in the end!
Oh dear im praying for you. Try and remember a due date isnt an experation date. Its just their guess as to when they think you should have delivered. God has perfect timing. Get out there and run with your babies and enjoy the rest of summer before your in for the winter. You are so blessed. Im sure uncomfortable. Lots of prayer! My baby was born at 8months and I felt a little cheated to miss out on the end part. Im sure you might argue with me at this point! lol. Hang in there :)
~Linds
For those of you with big families and comments from friends and family, I think I would smile and say that Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar set the bar high, but you are working on reaching it. You can then walk away while the rest of them try to revive the ones that passed out.
Linds, my daughter was 3.5 weeks early and I was eternally grateful. I just got a LOT of comments on her size - 75th %ile height and 5th %ile weight will do that. She was skinny!
Happy birthday to Corynn. Maybe you are getting your very own special, real-life doll today!
Rebecca, I just wanted to say I am thinking of you as you wait for your new baby to arrive.
My baby who is now 2 1/2 months old arrived 11 days past her due date and boy was it difficult. Prior to that the latest I'd gone was 5 days over (Isabella is #6).
My labour was really good though, fast and easy - 4th homebirth!! Praise God!
So I will be praying for the same for you.
My sister was 10 days over with her first and 14 days over with her second (I'd flown from New Zealand to Australia to help her and flew home before her baby had even arrived!!!) which was so difficult but she had a really good labour (waterbirth at a birthing unit) with her second.
I just wanted to encourage you that smooch will arrive at the right time and to say I know how hard it is to go past your due date and keep going for days!!! Smooch WILL arrive soon!
Love from Louise
Tracy~ that is SO FUNNY! I didn't notice that! Yes-he was born on Corynn's birthday, very early in the morning. The night nurse wrote all of our bands wrong and then corrected them all (except that one, apparently) because she had started her shift on the 1st and mistook the day.
You are Miss Observant!
Post a Comment