What you do in your house is worth as much as if you did it up in heaven for our Lord God. We should accustom ourselves to think of our position and work as sacred and well-pleasing to God, not on account of the position and work, but on account of the word and faith from which the obedience and the work flow. ~ Martin Luther

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Sarah

Edited to Add: I wanted to thank everyone for their comments yesterday in regards to this post. Your well-wishes and empathy were tremendously heartening to me. Perhaps it is silly, but everyone's assurances that I wasn't dumb really did make me feel better. Being married to a Farmboy through and through means he really doesn't "get" the whole crying over a cat thing. He was compassionate at first, but by the end of the night was making fun of me. Course, by the end of the night, I was making fun of myself, so flabberghasted was I!)

I was glad (once again) for the different kind of support I get through the thoughtful friends who visit me here. Thank you.




Yesterday when I was canning (what was supposed to be) a boatload of apples, I found our kitten-cat dead. I had been searching for her all morning, calling her name-walking around the property. The fact that she didn't come when I called her worried me more than I can say, since she would always RACE to us when we called (if she wasn't already by the door!) So I would call her every few minutes. Check the windows again and again.

Finally I found her.

I don't know what happened-not a trace of foulplay.

Ever since, I have been a big 'ole bawl baby. I stopped canning because I just couldn't anymore.

It's just she was so stinkin' sweet. Really personable. and she was always AROUND me.

If I was in the garden, she would come too.

If I were hanging clothes, there she was.

If I were blogging, she would be purring, curled up in my lap or when I was reading a book on the patio.

If I were reading to the children on the counch, she would crawl up my belly and lay herself under my chin for a snooze. It tickled and was cumbersome-but I loved it.

If she was outside, she would race in the moment the door was open.


If I laid a picnic blanket outside, she would be the first one on it.


The children, thankfully, didn't take it too hard. They certainly have handled it better than me.


I fear I am not that great of a country wife after all, if I get so emotional about an animal. I'm really dumb.

I wouldn't be sad about chickens. Or even Jed. But Sarah? She was a sweet part of our everyday and her only purpose was to be with us.


It's really dumb that I am so upset over her. But I am.


And for some reason, I can't stop crying.

IT'S JUST A CAT, FOR GOODNESS SAKE!

16 comments:

Bonnie said...

I am so sorry about the Sarah-Cat, but glad YOU were the one who found her.
And I think you listed a lot of very good reasons to cry about her, so don't be too hard on yourself!
I think I might know of something to cheer you up, so start watching your mailbox beginning Mondayish....
(and no, I will NOT be mailing you a cat.)

Alisha said...

I'm sorry about your little kitty. :( Being a country wife myself, I don't think you're any less country-tuff crying over a cat. They become a part of your family and you feel their loss. Bonnie said she wasn't mailing you a cat, but I'll mail you a puppy in a few weeks :D You can check out my latest pet boohooing spell and our puppies on my blog.

I just found your blog this week and I am enjoying immensely, if that's any consolation. I am wanting to can so badly!

Hope your day gets better.

Miss Breezy said...

That is so sad! Sarah was such a pretty kitty.

When we had to put our dog down last year, we couldn't stop crying; I understand. :(

Love ya'
-Breezy

Devildogwife said...

No, it's not dumb that you're sad. Sarah was part of your family. We have grieved the loss of several different pets, so I completely understand. I'm truly sorry for your loss. :(

Riahli said...

My first cat was a tabby and he was the sweetest thing, when he died I cried really hard, my husband even came home from work to bury him. I'm usually pretty tough about animals but sometimes there are those certain pets that really become a part of your family, you can't help but miss them when they are gone. I completely understand, and I say cry it out. So sorry for your loss, and I agree with the others, it doesn't make you any less tough, and it's not dumb.

Kalona said...

I'm so sorry about your little cat. It's not dumb to feel awful about the loss of a pet; it means you have love and compassion for God's creatures. They have a way of creeping into our hearts, and they give back unconditional love. And now I'm gonna go out and love on my puppies!

Peggy said...

Oh Rebecca,

I am so sorry!! I do understand and NO it doesn't make you any less a "country wife!" It shows compassion for all God's creatures!! I still miss my Sammy Cat and we had to put him down 4 1/2 years ago. We were gifted a cat, Willow, about 2 years ago but found out I am insanely allergic to cats!! Who would have thought... She now lives with friends of ours but I miss her dearly!!
So my dear friend I just wanted to let you know I am so sorry and will be praying for you!!

Love, Peggy

Rosemary said...

My heart goes out to you, Rebecca. Sarah was not just a cat, she was a part of your family. She brought you joy and love, if only for a little while.
Big hugs, Rosemary

Full of Grace said...

Rebecca,
if anyone understands..I do.

I am so sorry about Sarah....

...they call me mommy... said...

Can I just give ya a big 'ole HUG?

((((((((((((HUG))))))))))))

Love,
Amy

Father's Grace Ministries said...

So sorry to hear about your little kitty-cat- she was part of your life, of course you'll mourn her loss.

Hugs

Claire

Paula said...

you are not silly at all and don't think that. God made you a very compassionate person - He gave us dominion over the animals and a love to care for them. I am sorry for your loss. These are some precious pictures you have to remember her by.

Victoria said...

We've had more cat/kitten deaths around here the last 5 months, I've lost count. Almost every one has left me sad...and none of them were our favorites. We have 2 sweet kitties now that had better live a very long time.

Sarah looks to have been a beautiful and sweet cat. Cry. Then look at those last 2 pictures and laugh!:)

Wendy said...

Wow...she was a REALLY beautiful cat! I am so sorry you are feeling SO sad! You have a tender heart Rebecca! I hope that you feel better soon!

hillary@dark :: light said...

Rebecca, I cried just reading about it and seeing the pictures. It's not dumb at all. I cried one time when I hit a squirrel ~ now THAT is dumb! Hugs!!

Leah said...

I'm so very sorry about Sarah. :(

Scott would be the first to say that your response is the only right one to have when you are a steward of God's creation and one of His creatures has passed. And I agree. We've cried over many an animal and, unfortunately, we'll probably cry over many more over the coming years.

On a happy note, we have several black and white kittens ready to leave their mama! I only wish you could come pick one up or have us drop one off. They're SO cute!