What you do in your house is worth as much as if you did it up in heaven for our Lord God. We should accustom ourselves to think of our position and work as sacred and well-pleasing to God, not on account of the position and work, but on account of the word and faith from which the obedience and the work flow. ~ Martin Luther

Wednesday, February 03, 2010

More than a bit of rambling.

Also entitled: Feel Free to Skip This Post Entirely


Right about now is when I am sick to death of old man winter and pining, PINING for spring. Life. AiR. Warmth. Walks. Picnics. SOMETHING.

I find myself, in this last cold homestretch, very unmotivated. Lethargic. and GLUM.

Of course, Smooch isn't helping very much either. For the past two weeks, this is the redundant run-down of my days:

Wake up. Eat breakfast (because I promised to work on that this year). The day passes.
Lunchtime. Feeling RAVENOUS. STARVED. MALNOURISHED. I eat.
1pm...it begins. Nausea. I walk around in a stupor. Not too fast, lest I barf. Or I just sit and stare. It gets progressively worse until dinnertime, when I have to figure on COOKING something while being utterly repulsed by food in general. I make something (some days more elegant than others) and then I sit with the family and watch them eat (and try not to gag). On a good day, I can choke down some yogurt. (I have had about two "good days" these past two weeks. )

SO basically, I am eating yogurt for breakfast and (usually) leftovers for lunch and adamently not eating for the rest of the day. You would *THINK* I would be losing some weight here people. Instead? I have gained nine pounds. NINE POUNDS. NINE POUNDS! You are likely to gain 3-4 pounds by the end of your first trimester (which happens to be two weeks away for me), just so you know.

This is SO not fair. I am in this awful fatter-than-ever phase with a good excuse that nobody knows, so to them I am just fat. (I am not one of the lucky ones who skips that phase, *cough*cough*Bonnie) And when you are standing above the toilet waiting for Ralph, you just aren't feeling very pretty, you know what I mean?

I am normally a glass-half-full type. Cheerful, happy, optimistic. But winter (and first trimesters) screw me all up.

So needless to say, I have got to get myself cheered up.

This, my friends, is why I have been an absentee blogger. I have been struggling with being an absentee WOMAN, too.

It has been FIVE days (gasp!) since I last prattled on about something or another, so I figure I am about due:

* Adele, at fourteen months, *FINALLY* began saying Mama. And since then, she hasn't stopped. She says Mama probably 350 times a day. Over and over again. and LOUDLY. She calls me from across the house or pops 'em off even while I am holding her. It is crazy cute. (and sometimes exhausting) Definitely a gift.

She also says Papa, but she says that in a sweet, whispered, lovely way.

AND (all in the same week, I know!) she now says Andrew. And signs please and thank you.

Of course~ of all the fifteen times I have tried to catch these feats on video tape, not a one has actually caught it on tape.

* Lest you think her only progressing in the verbal department, same week as the words, she walked across the room. A GOOD 12 steps in a row! So last week was a big week for Miss Bunkin.

(she also throws herself backwards for kicks, not giving any regard to what is (or isn't) behind her...in this case...ISN'T. Glad I cuaght her or she would have toppled right off the bed.)

* Two days ago at the start of resttime, I opened up the book RIGHT BEHIND by Nathan D. Wilson and Mr. Sock-ha for a look-sie (which is a parody of the whole Left Behind series), and two hours later put it down....completed. I had read a whole book (albeit with only 105 pages) in one day! This has not happened to me in.....years.

*I want to adopt several Haitian orphans. Which I know all sorts of people are saying. But I have been wanting to adopt orphans from Africa for years...so it is not said flippantly. I wish there was a way....

* Matt and I got in a tiff last night (which I divulge here only for the sake of the story): something about me ording a pizza (yes, I admit it) because I couldn't stomach the thought of cooking which he agreed to because he thought I had been craving it. But then I didn't eat it, only served it, which made him upset because, as he stated: "I want REAL food for supper! I would have cooked something! If we have pizza, I want YOUR pizza-not that junk!) And while I was still upset, I had this weird inkling that I had been given a pretty awesome compliment. Wow. I must make pretty good pizza to be better than a pizza joint? Rock on.

* I borrowed, through interlibrary loan, the fabulous book, REAL FOOD (I always know when I get a fabulous book because Matt steals it from me) and nearly put it down after reading all about our 45 million year ago ancestors eating such and such (on the FIRST page!) which, in my mind, discredits her. But I am glad I didn't because, ignoring all the ridiculous references to our evolutionary backgrounds, there is a WEALTH of information there about food. All sorts of crazy stuff I had NO clue about and some stuff that I just needed affirmation. I knew it and lived it, but didn't know just how GOOD it was that I was doing it. I would highly recommend it-as long as you have the capability of seeing nonsense as nonsense. Thanks to that book, we are now buying organic raw milk. After about one week, it was made blatently obvious that we need a MILK cow. Soon and very soon. Problem is: I am allergic to cows. Not in a esophogus-closing, scary sort of way but a sneezing, swelling, itchy eyes if I smell their dander sort of way. So. Not sure how we are going to work this since Matt is gone so often. But we will figure something out. I *REALLY* want one. (It would work wonders for my crazy yogurt addiction these days too.) And CHEESE! CHEESE!!!!

* I am sick to death of snow crafts. Melting snowmen, included.



*I made Matt the exciting (and absolutely INSANE) promise that if he bought me an electric grain mill, I would from henceforth bake ALL our bread products. Um. Yeah. That is a HUGE, CRAZY promise...but exciting, too. No? Of course, all I would have needed was a base model get-the-job-done, nothing-fancy mill. But MATT had two requirements: It had to have real STONE mills and it had to come with a manual handle (as IF!). As it turns out, mills with his "requirements" were priced up to $1500!! I ended up finding this one for a fraction of that cost: Golden Grain Deluxe Mill for a whopping $500.00 (cough, cough *sputter*sputter). The man has expensive taste when it comes to quality. But considering it's competitors....I *guess* it isn't bad? wow. That't a lot of money. I guess we will be eating storebought wheat for a while yet: He has to fork over some of his hard-earned end-of-the-year bonus and I have got me some saving to do. (Anyone have this machine? Anyone order from this company? I'd love feedback.)

*Smooch got his/her first baby gift! Incidently, I finger those little ears and try to imagine the teeny little head that will fit inside it on a daily basis. And then I think such tinyness would be a good bed for the whole little Thumbelbaby that is Smooch right now, all two inches of him/her.
Thank you Nanci! You are very dear!



*I sorted through my fabric on shelves yesterday and purged myself of excess. I didn't get rid of EVERYTHING I didn't love, because some fabrics would be good for gifts and such, but I did get rid of things that I didn't think I would ever use. And it did make pretty good dent! As I refolded and reorganized the fabric that I was saving, I found inspiration anew to start creating. Made the effort totally worth it.

* Due to the last two bullets, and my incessantly glum state as of late, I have decided to challenge myself to make something handmade every week until spring. I might even make more...but I didn't want to set my challenge up for failure, just in case. For Smooch or not, it is time to get crafty. I will be sharing these things here, of course.

Thus ends your tortured reading of a ridiculously long, not-worth-a-lick blogpost of nothingness.

Have a good day~and enjoy your dinner! ;-)

31 comments:

Bonnie said...

Notice that I posted a picture of mostly the front side, and NOT my backside. B. informed me last week that he sure could tell I was putting on weight (I have to step on his back when he gets home from work- his request)
Gee. Thanks. I love you too.
I downed a can of pineapple for breakfast, absolutely NO food sounds good. Except tortilla chips. Which we are out of. So I have resorted to crisping up taco shells with fresh cracked salt. I hope I still have some left for the kids family B-day party this weekend. It would be a bummer to have a taco bar and without tacos.

Hey I bake 90% of our br
I probabluead stuffs, and its actually not as rough as it sounds. Crackers and junk foods are next on my list to conquer. And can I just say, I have brought our grocery bill down $40 by eliminating things that I could make instead of buy? Yeah, I'm still reeling.
I have a letter started, hopefully I'll get it out to you before the weeks out.....

Oh, and I found a mozzerella recipe to try, and it uses POWDERED milk- I'm so excited, cheese making intrigues me.
I probably have more to say, but the house looks like a tornado hit it, and B. will be home in 50 minutes, so Ta-Ta.

MameyJane said...

You poor dear! You sound absolutely miserable. I guess the beans are working anymore? But the fact that you still want to craft shows there is some life left in you! I'm glad you posted--I missed ya! You're just about my favorite blog and I feel like I'm visiting with a friend when I stop by. :) "This, too, shall pass". I hope it's soon for you!

Kris in TN said...

I know this isn't a grain mill that would meet your hubby's requirements, but I love my Nutrimill Grain Mill and I got it here - http://www.pleasanthillgrain.com/index.aspx#Nutrimill - it does a great job and is very versatile and only $270 with free shipping!

I hope springs comes quickly for you, dearie!

Love,
Kris

Anonymous said...

My friends has the whispermill and loves it. I have been pricing them as well and it isn't pretty. :(

Jess

Rebecca said...

Bonnie~well, that is encouraging. I found a recipe today for wheat tortilla's. Mozzerella with POWDERED milk? You'll have to let me know how it works...maybe it is just Smooch, but that sounds pretty gross to me right now. Watch it be fabulous. hehe

Mamey Jane~ wow. Your comment was great. Thank you for liking me even when I am ho-hum. Your comment made my day.

Kris~THAT is the one I showed Matt! I have heard great things about the Nutrimill. But he is a stubborn one, that Matt.

Jess~no it isn't. Especially when I have had hopes to be saving up for a MACRO lens....but I guess a grainmill IS more important.

Riahli said...

Love this post, rambling is fun some times. :) I get the same way when I am pregnant. Sick in the afternoons, barely able to eat..yet I still manage to gain massive amounts of weight, oh the Joys!! I am at the need Spring now stage too, I really start to drag this time of year! Can't wait until I can spend some time in the garden...

Anonymous said...

Oh you poor dear! Be of good cheer for this to will pass! I have had my whispermill for six years and used it everyday, baking for our ten! It has alas succumbed to its death! And the warranty is gone! So be prewarned....It was a great mill, but for the money; I wanted it to last for as long as our children... and so not fair, our baby is two months OLDER than your Adele and he hasn't spoken a single Mama or Papa YET!!!!!!!!
Many hugs from Mumofeight

Nicki said...

Hi Rebecca
instead of getting a cow - have you considered a goat? You may not be allergic them? We milk a small herd of goats - and their raw milk is even better for you than raw cow milk!
Hope as you pass into your 2nd trimester that your wellbeing improves :)

JenniferM said...

We bought a Nutrimill this past year as well -- works great! (I think the Whispermill mentioned here is no longer made because that is what was recommended to us.) Of course, a mill meeting your husband's standards would have been great, but that certainly wasn't in the budget (you didn't mention the $45 shipping on top of the $500).

Are you taking any vitamins? With my first two and at the beginning of my third pregnancy, I was nausous. It was manageable, but not pleasant. Then, I started taking Rainbow Light natural prenatals and the nausea was completely gone. The pill itself wasn't the most pleasant, but well worth the results.

Devildogwife said...

Sorry to hear that you're having a rough time of it. Wish I could send some of our weather your way as I know it would brighten your spirits.

My hubby insists on quality items too, so it takes a little longer to get some things. In the end, it's worth it.

Wendy said...

Rebecca, I have a bottle of pills that are all natural. They are called Mommys Bliss Morning Sickness Magic. Doc gave them to me for Asher, but it was sort of too late I was over it. They also make different products like gripe water and stuff. I suppose if you are feeling pretty bad you could give it a try!

I dont know anything about grain mills...but I like baked bread...ha ha.

It is time for a visit...if you are up to it. Give me a couple of dates and I will see if they check out with me...I NEED adult conversation :-)

Tracy said...

If I may make a suggestion, I think you should try baking all of your bread BEFORE you spend that amount of money on a mill. I've been at it for abot 5 months now, with no mill yet, but I'm glad to know that I can bake well, AND that I don't hate it.

I agreew ith the poster who reccomended a goat rather than a cow. I know people who have goats, and they love them.

Nanci said...

Awww, Rebecca, I'm sorry that you are having such a rough time of it. I can't imagine being nauseated on top of the duldrums of this time of the year. Wish we could craft together for an evening; I miss that more than words can express!!!!

I was excited about your baby coming and just wanted to send the wee one a little something. . . and I've fallen in love with these little hats. Also, hope the shirred fabric I sent, didn't add to unwanted stash for you. I guess I should have asked you before sending it.

Pappy has been transferred from the hospital to Rehab and is progress well now. Thanks so much for the prayers. Just couldn't blog when all that was going on; just didn't have it within me. I know I really need to do it now, but just don't seem to know where to begin.

Love you and am interceding for you.
Wrap yourself in a whole lot of warm hugs from me.

Jerelene said...

So sorry to hear that you aren't feeling well. Hopefully you'll be past the morning sickness very soon.
You are such a busy Momma..how do you find time for it all? The baking bread would be fun, but a lot of work I bet. It would smell lovely :)
A lot of people here use goat milk too. I've been thinking about trying to find someone that has it too...as Sam has such bad allergies. It would be worth a try..
Spring will be here before you know it...hang in there :)
Hugs....Jerelene

dr_bristow said...

Hey Rebecca,
Congratulations on your expected baby! How did I miss the pregnancy announcement? When are you due? I'm so excited for you guys!
Alane

Shanna said...

Oh, that reminds me of when my Lily went through the "Mama" phase a few months ago. All day long was, "Mama"..."Yes?"....""Mama"..."What?"...."Mama"... Finally, I decided I had to film it and put it on the blog so that everyone could hear. And what happened? Over and over, she said, "Daddy".

Rebecca said...

Lots of great feedback! Thank you everyone!

Nicki~ alas. It must be animal dander because I even get sniffly at my sister's house who has two dogs. My sis-in-law has a goat and the same is true for her. My poor farmer husband married the WRONG girl I think.

Wendy~ oh GREAT! I have been anxious but didn't want to seem like a stalker. ;-) I'll check my calendar today!

Tracy~ I know at 27, it seems hardly possible at being "seasoned" at anything, but I AM with baking bread.

I have lots of experience baking bread so I know precisely what I am getting myself into (hehe). I love it, one of my favorite chores, but I would like to use fresh wheat rather than buying flour. It won't be too difficult a transition (except maybe when it comes to tortillas and ciabatta bread)

Nanci~so glad to hear about Pappy! Your package worked wonders for me-you have no idea. Such a little effort can mean so VERY much to a person. I was very thankful for those shirred pieces and am planning to work on them for St. Patty's dresses for the girls. yay! Thank you~! I have a letter coming to you. I have been meaning to call you since NEW YEARS DAY but we don't have long distance except when Matt hooks up that skype phone which he can only do on his work laptop for some reason-and with him being away so much lately...and now I feel so crummy I just want to bury myself in my bed by 8'oclock at night. Please forgive me and give me just a *smidge* more time to get myself in order...otherwise a phone conversation might serve only to DEPRESS YOU! :-)

Alane~ (hey I LIKE your name! you've never signed it before, I don't think! It is beautiful!) Yup. Got a bun in the oven. Due (from what I can tell) around Aug. 27th. Three days after our anniversary! yippee!

I announced it with a photo of pickles on chocolate ice cream. (I *HOPE* you don't think I would actually EAT that stuff for fun?!?!) hehehe

...they call me mommy... said...

I LOVE these kinda posts!!! Must be the talker in me...;) I am sorry for the REASON for the post though...the sickies...man, praying for you & Bonnie!
Hubby and I have been talking about a grain mill for some time...no wisdom here!
Sending hugs, sunshine, and a whole lotta *virtual* tulips your way today!

:)

Rosemary said...

Big hugs to you, Rebecca.
You, my lady, are a gem.

Peggy said...

OH I have missed you so much! I am sorry to hear that you have been feeling so ill!

You will find that making all your own baked goods is really not all that daunting. We were making all our own baked goods until now. Once we get our stuff and settled in I'll go back to it. For a time we were even making our own junk food (potato chips/tortillas) and crackers but the boys ended up eating a whole batch at one sitting so now it is special occasion stuff instead. However I just came across a new "recipe" for potato chips which store for a couple of weeks. Sounds perfect for bagged lunchs. We also make our own yogurt without the aide of a yogurt maker (just a stock pot and the heating pad). I love how thick and tangy it comes out. We stir in jam when we go to eat it...

Oh I can't wait to tell you all about our new location. There is a farm right behind us... I'm hoping to meet them sometime soon. They have sheep, llamas, beef and dairy cows, free range/pastured chickens, and pigs.

I'll try to get a letter off to you next week. Chris is taking the next two afternoons off so we can run errands. We are looking for a full bed and mattresses plus a new step ladder.

Miss Adele is so sweet! She sure is growing fast!!!

(Hope to have a post up before the week is out or early next week!!)

Shannon said...

You should check out her newer book Real Food for Mother & Baby. It is the best info out there regarding what you should eat while pregnant, nursing, and for baby's first foods.

Also check out westonaprice.org. They're a little less humanist than Miss Planck, who I agree with on many things, evolution NOT being one of them.

Rebecca said...

Peggy~ YAY! It sounds heavenly! Can't wait to here more!

Shannon~thank you for the recommendation. I just spotted that the other day and have already requested it inter-library loan! Thanks for the shoutout though!

Anonymous said...

Rebecca,

Discovered your blog by accident. I have been happily reading, although we disagree on some things, we also agree on many things. Your stance on evolution, and your almost dismissal of a wonderful book have almost sent me over the edge. A closed minded approach to learning such as you displayed is surprising. I am glad you reconsidered and stuck with reading and learning from this book. I however, am very seriously reconsidering reading this blog...evolution is proven...god is not.....

Mar said...

Rebecca, I found your blog through a link to the homemade Christmas that Meredith from likemerchantships put in her tumbler (or whatever it's called). At any rate, you are very creative and talented and I think trying to make one thing a week will be very soothing for you.

I remember the morning sickness days and crying in the grocery store because I knew that I needed to eat and the only things I wanted were fresh blueberries, strawberries, and raspberries - it was February so they weren't easy to find in the mid-Atlantic region. I then went to TGI Friday's to see if a Sunday brunch item might be good. I looked at the menu and started crying again. The waitress asked what was wrong, I explained, and she suggested one of their menu beverages. It was a combination of orange sherbert, orange juice, and strawberries. It was HEAVEN! Maybe something similar would help you, with or without yogurt added...

As far as the comment from Anonymous at 8:02 p.m., I find it FASCINATING that s/he accuses you of being close-minded because evolution is "proven" and God is not and THEN turns around and says s/he will have to reconsider visiting your site because of this. Now that's not close-minded AT ALL, is it??? Once someone is too scared to even use a fake name and has to stay Anonymous, it's hard to take their little snits seriously.

Peggy said...

Rebecca,

I just want to let you know what a blessing you are and how GOD is working in you and through you! Please DO NOT let Satan's little fiery darts get you down... we love you and are praying for you as well!!

I am getting a letter out to you today. OH did you hear the exciting news?! We get the mail delivered to our HOUSE! No more driving 25 miles one way to pick up the mail!! Isn't it exciting!! We just walk across the road.... I know, silly, but I oh so loved getting the mail as a child (still do..)

Lova ya!!

Oh, I FINALLY posted on my blog... pictures included.

Anonymous said...

Reacting to someone's close-mindedness by not encouraging it or supporting it is no being closed minded. It is simply being a rational, well-thought out, open minded humanistic person. Hey Mar, I'm pretty sure you don't understand the definition of closed minded or open minded. For that matter, it doesn't seem as if you have any idea of what a rational argument is, esp. considering that you refer to someone's opinion that differs from yours as a snit.

I have no issue if you choose to home school your children, or if you want to teach them about god and religion, but to indoctrinate them from a young age with a curriculum of at best misinformation, and at worst downright lies, is pure and simple child abuse. You are teaching your children to be sheep, not to think for themselves or gain information from very sources. It is even worse when you use your beliefs as the basis for illogical arguments. So please please please keep your religious beliefs in your house and in your church and stop trying to influence educational policy country wide.

Rebecca said...

Anonymous~

A comment box response to a no-name commenter who may or may not return seems hardly the means for a proper God/evolution debate so I won't waste my time there.

I will make only one point then, and that is in regards to what we read. I considered closing that book for the very reason you are considering not returning to this blog. Call it close-mindedness or liberty: if a person expressed (verbally or in writing) what we understand to be misinformation then they naturally are discredited and demerited in our minds. That is true with me and that is true with you.

Every person discerns truth by measuring it against their own presumptions, no matter the worldview with which you measure.

I am as adamantly against evolution as you are (seemingly) for it so I can assure you that there will be plenty more "God talk" around here. And probably a bit more jokes at the expense of evolution....

Continue to read (or not)~that is your right, just as it was MY right to close a book clearly misinformed.

Jess said...

Let me share this verse with you Anonymous..

Hebrews 11:1
Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.


God is ever present and I am sorry that you have not had the opportunity to realize this fully. I can only hope that one day you DO KNOW HIM as WE do.

Mar said...

Anonymous, as I said, when you don't use a name, it's hard to take you seriously. I did think about stating a few facts about evolution versus God and His magnificent creation, but comments on a blog don't strike me as the proper forum for that and I did not want to highjack Rebecca's blog.

Rebecca, I apologize for starting this, but Anonymous' original comments were so negative that I just couldn't let them go - I should work on that! Again, my apologies.

Sue said...

Rebecca.....CONGRATULATIONS! How very blessed! My prayers and sympathy go out to you for the horrible nausea, and prayers for your health and the health of your new blessing as well.

Wanted to tell you about my grain mill. I have had a k-tec kitchen mill for almost 10 years, and have ground faithfully every week...everything from prairie gold white wheat to brown rice (since we have to be gluten free now), navy beans, quinoa, millet...all kinds of things. It is wonderful! It also grinds more finely than any other mill that I've tryed. Just wanted to let you know...and it was $190.

God bless you, your family and your efforts in proverbs 31 mom living! ~Sue~

Anonymous said...

Mar, Im not sure why it is so important to you that i use a name...and it obviously is since you keep fixating on it. Not like mar is any more informative than anonymous. For the record, my name is Bette. I'm not going to waste any more of my time or Rebecca's space going back and forth with you. If you want to continue this discussion elsewhere, I would be more than happy to, esp. if you can prove to me god exists.

Jess, don't you dare foist your beliefs on me or pretend to feel sorry for me. i lead an incredibly full and joyous life surrounded by well-educated, open minded, peace loving family and friends. My life would be much less if i fixated on god the way you seem to. Much happier being able to quote Howard Zinn and Margaret Sanger and John Muir...